Sunday, April 17, 2011

Spring Sundays ~ Stop Gossip!


Mothers, don't let your daughters grow up to be gossips!

Just feel like sharing what's on my heart today.

A gossip, tale-bearer, whisperer, back-biter.

We've all, unfortunately, felt the effects of someone with this hurtful habit.
In fact, I'd say by just seeing these words, someone's face popped into your
head quite quickly.

Merriam-Webster's dictionary says this of reputation:
-overall quality or character as seen or judged by people in general
-a widespread belief that someone or something has a particular characteristic
Once your reputation is established, it's pretty hard, & in some cases impossible,
to change it.
As for grown ladies who seem to thrive in the gossip department, I'm not sure there's much I can say that will help them.
A gossiper always has an excuse or 'valid' reason for the things they say, the stories they repeat, & the falsehoods they share.
May God show them the err of their ways & lead them to repentance.
So, I write this primarily to mothers who have daughters at home, imploring you to teach your daughters NOT to be gossips!
It's only by teaching our daughters when they are young about this vicious & destructive behaviour that this cycle can be broken!
Teach them what the Word says in regards to this ... before they establish their reputation as a gossiper!
What is a gossiper? 
It is a person who chatters or repeats idle talk and rumors, especially about the private affairs of others.
It is one with malicious intentions, who loves to hear about the discontent and struggles of others ... then repeats it as gossip.
Proverbs calls it a few other names.
A tale-bearer is a person who spreads scandal or tells secrets, a gossip.
A whisperer is one who talks behind someone's back.
By the very act of the whispering itself, they are acknowledging that they
shouldn't be broadcasting it).
It's interesting that in the Greek, the language of the New Testament, the word for 'whisper,' actually starts with the sound, Psssst. Psssst.
Secret slander.
Back-biter is one who speaks maliciously about a person who's not there.
Each one of these describes a toxic person ... one whom we should avoid!
The Bible also speaks of tattlers, busybodies, & meddlers ... those who love to be in other people's business & matters which are none of their concern.
 Proverbs says: "A perverse man sows strife, and a whisperer, (a slanderer, a gossip) separates the best of friends."
Proverbs 17:9 says: "He who covers a transgression seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates the best of friends."
We can actually break up relationships and friendships by sowing seeds of
distrust or doubt.
I've seen this happen mores times that I can count.
Proverbs says that if you're wise, you will avoid gossips, doing what you can to shut it down--graciously, kindly, lovingly.
But you will not be a part of destroying the body of Christ for which He gave His life.
Walking away from a friendship with someone who's given to gossip is a wise decision!
Not only is there sin in spreading gossip, there's sin is in listening to the gossip.
When we do, we allow our ears become garbage cans!

The scriptures are plenteous on this topic ... & God's Word is like a mirror.
It exposes us, showing what we really are.
Acknowledging this behaviour in our daughters {& ourselves} is the ONLY way
we can start to change.
Stop making excuses!
Their spiritual welfare is depending on it.
Don't let them grow up continuing in this sin, establishing & carrying on this reputation.

Prov. 26:20 For lack of wood the fire goes out, and where there is no whisperer, quarreling ceases.

Eph. 4:29 Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

Here are a few ways to combat this problem:
-Get to the root of this problem ... why the gossip?
{It usually stems from their own insecurities, in which they somehow feel better about
themselves by tearing others down.}

-Use your brain first & your mouth second!
-Think about what you're getting ready to do {gossip} & don't do it!
-Stop talking before you speak ill of someone.
-Refuse to tear down another brother/sister in the Lord!
-Don't eavesdrop on a conversation, only hearing bits & pieces, & then attempt
to go & repeat it!

And the best rule of all ... do unto others as you'd have them do unto you.
If you don’t want people to gossip about you, then don’t participate in gossip.

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